Urban Mindfulness--The Book!--Has Been Released

Dear friends, colleagues, readers, and fans,

I am excited to announce the release of my book, Urban Mindfulness: Cultivating Peace, Presence, and Purpose in the Middle of It All!  As a clinical psychologist in New York, I've seen many of us struggle to manage stress while living and working in the city.  The traffic, noise, fast pace and other factors can undermine our happiness and well-being.

My book helps to solve this problem by inviting us to be here mindfully--paying attention to our thoughts, emotions, and sensory experiences as they arise from moment-to-moment.  The book is divided into 5 sections, each devoted to where you would practice mindfulness (i.e., at home, at work, on the go, at play, or anytime, anywhere).  Within each section, there are 10 chapters, which provide practical tips (e.g., how to meditate on the subway), thoughtful reflections (e.g., questioning why you're here in the city), and fun exercises (e.g., being a tourist in your own neighborhood).

I wrote this book to appeal to two groups of people:  (1) folks who are unfamiliar with mindfulness; and (2) those of us who strive to practice mindfulness regularly while being in the city.  Maybe you’ve heard about mindfulness, and want to learn more about it.  Maybe you regularly do yoga, get massages, or go on retreats, only to find your calm center unravels as soon as you hit city traffic.  Maybe you’ve given up on trying to meditate in context of your busy, urban existence, but really want the sense of peace it can provide.  Maybe you’re a healing professional who has been encouraging your clients to be more mindful.  If any of these descriptions are applicable, this book is for you (and your friends, family members, patients, etc.).  To put it another way, this book is about practicing mindfulness beyond meditation or psychotherapy.  Sometimes, I joke that Urban Mindfulness is about taking the practice “off of the cushion” and “off of the couch”, and instead “taking it to the streets."  Literally.

Professionally, my book has been well-received by many experts on mindfulness, including Drs. Christopher Germer, Robert Leahy, Elizabeth Roemer, and Jeff Brantley.  Sharon Salzberg, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society and author of Lovingkindness, found the book to be “an excellent guide.”

Some of you might know that I have been writing on this topic for about 2 years.  I founded UrbanMindfulness.org in 2008, and write for PsychologyToday.com.  Over 30,000 people have been reading these blogs annually, and the number has been growing steadily.  This shows that there is clearly an interest--and need--in revising our experience of life in the city.

So, please check out Urban Mindfulness: Cultivating Peace, Presence, and Purpose in the Middle of It All, which is available for purchase everywhere (Amazon, Barnes &Noble, New Harbinger, and local bookstores).  Its cover price ($15.98) is about what you would pay for one yoga class in most major cities, and you’re likely to get just as much--if not more!--from reading my book.  You can also review the many free resources available at UrbanMindfulness.org.  In addition, I invite you to become a friend of Urban Mindfulness on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, subscribe to blog’s RSS feed, and view the Urban Mindfulness channel on YouTube.  Over the next month, I’ll be  uploading some videos of “mindfulness in action,” including a demonstration of subway meditation and “Mindfulness vs. Road Rage.”

If you’d like to support Urban Mindfulness--the book, blog, organization, or practice--please share this post with your friends, family, and colleagues.  Thank you very much for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Jonathan S. Kaplan

New Meditation Center Review: Interdependence Project

Submitted by Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

I just uploaded a new review by Alyssa Barba, our summer intern.  She visited an introductory meditation session at the Interdependence Project in the East Village, and really liked it!  Check out her experience by clicking here:  IDP Review

Pretty

By Emily Polak, Ph.D.

Yesterday I was late to meet a friend for lunch because I was not happy with my outfit. Every time I leave my apartment, I want to feel cute, attractive, pretty.

I recently came across a spoken word piece by a woman named Katie Makkai that resonated on many levels. It begins with her as a girl asking her mother, "Will I be pretty?"  She references “women who will prowl 30 stores in 6 malls to find the perfect cocktail dress but haven’t a clue where to find fulfillment or how to wear joy.”

She makes a powerful point. Joy lies only in the present moment. And while it can be empowering to feel good about how one looks, fulfillment does not come from the right outfit or accessory. The constant struggle to feel attractive is well, pretty depressing.

She ends by telling her future daughter, “The word pretty is unworthy of everything you will be. You will be pretty intelligent, pretty creative, pretty amazing, but you will never be merely pretty.”

So next time you find yourself stressing about whether you look good enough, stop and check in. Notice your self-judgments and attempt to be a bit kinder to yourself. Be mindful of all the ways you’re pretty amazing beyond how you look today.

Buddhism & Psychotherapy: An Interview with Dr. Mark Epstein

By Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

Recently, I had the privilege of corresponding with Dr. Mark Epstein, a distinguished psychiatrist and author.  When I read his first book, Thoughts without a Thinker: Psychotherapy from a Buddhist Perspective, it blew me away!  His book was my first exposure to the integration of Buddhism with psychotherapy, and I was amazed by the parallels that he elucidated.  As someone who was new to Buddhism and psychoanalysis, I found his writing to be very accessible without any sacrifice in sophistication or eloquence.  I especially appreciated the fact that he "went to the source" in his writing.  That is, he referenced the works of Freud, Winnicott, and other psychoanalysts as well as the original Buddhist teachings.  Since that time over a decade ago, I've been a big fan of his writing, and I recommend his books wholeheartedly (available here at Amazon).

Early next month, Dr. Epstein will be giving two presentations with Sharon Salzberg and Robert Thurman at the Tibet House in NYC.  Entitled "The Healing Power of Awareness," the first talk will discuss  mindfulness and meditation; it is scheduled for Friday, November 5, at 7 pm.  On the following day, an all-day workshop will review the basic teachings of Buddhism and likely incorporate meditation, too; it's entitled "The Inner Revolution."  These presentations promise to be an interesting, helpful exploration of mindfulness from a Buddhist perspective.  The crew from Urban Mindfulness will be there in force--at least three of us, and maybe more.  So, please enjoy reading the interview below (his responses are in italics), and we hope to see you at the Tibet House on November 5th and 6th.

Interview Questions

In what ways, do living and working in the city facilitate or hinder the cultivation of mindfulness or contemplative practice?

City or country, it's the same challange.  There's never enough time for contemplative practice, there's always more pressing things to attend to.  The concerns of daily life are like the waves in the ocean; there are an infinite number of them, wherever you are.

What suggestions do you have for people to practice mindfulness in the city?

Practice.

How has your experience of the city changed as a result of your meditation practice?

I love the city.  I moved here after I was already practicing and loved it right away.  I still do.

What is the most significant way in which your practice of Buddhism has influenced your practice as a psychiatrist who does psychotherapy?

It taught me to see my patients as already free.

Based on your work with patients, what is the most common obstacle to the development of a meditation practice?

Procrastination.

What advice do you have for patients (and others out there) who say that they can’t meditate?

That's no excuse.

Meditation and psychotherapy are sometimes accused of being very self-centered pursuits.  By engaging in these activities, how can we improve our world or address some of its injustices (e.g., racism, hate crimes, etc.)?

It's not clear that it makes much of a difference but sometimes they help individuals to feel more empowered.

In your experience, which Buddhist principle is the most difficult for Westerners to understand?

The easy answer is shunyata or emptiness which nobody understands.  But Westerners might have a particularly difficult time understanding love.

How do you explain the growing convergence of Buddhism and Western psychology?

Both traditions make the self the focus and the more you focus on the self the more it recedes, the more difficult it is to understand.  This is interesting and keeps people open and looking for answers.  So there is a natural conversation to be had between the two worlds.

Can you tell us a little bit about what you plan to discuss at your upcoming talk at the Tibet House?

We want to create a little room for people to work with their own minds.   That's what we will be talking about and that's what we'll be hoping to encourage.  The point of the weekend, though, is to have fun and to see that working in this way is joyful, even if it sometimes feels arduous.  Bob and Sharon and I always have fun together---we want that to be infectious.

Mark Epstein, M.D. is a psychiatrist in private practice in New York City and the author of a number of books about the interface of Buddhism and psychotherapy, including Thoughts without a Thinker, Going to Pieces without Falling Apart, Going on Being and Open to Desire.  His newest work, Psychotherapy without the Self, is published by Yale University Press.  He received his undergraduate and medical degrees from Harvard University and is currently Clinical Assistant Professor in the Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis at New York University.

Photo Credit:  Larry Bercow

Making the City Your Lake

By Jennifer Egert, Ph.D.

The Omega Institute sponsored a program in the city earlier in the year on Buddhist and Western psychology with Jack Kornfeld, Tara Brach and Mark Epstein. At one point in the weekend, Jack Kornfeld recounted a famous saying of the Buddha’s, “A spoon of salt in a glass of water makes the water undrinkable. A spoon of salt in a lake is almost unnoticed.”

When our lives are small, when we have a lot of tension, resistance and close off, then the challenges faced by life can exert a very powerful effect. However, when we are not closed, broaden our experience and create a “large, open life” then the challenges and sufferings we face become a smaller part of our overall experience and therefore impact us less. This made me think a lot about what a “larger lake” might look like in the context of city life.

The city can be thought of as a vast lake. So much going on. So much to do, to learn. So many directions we can take ourselves and our lives. Just open Timeout NY, or New York Magazine or any newspaper or local publication. At any moment in time, there is something to do that might broaden or enrich your life in some way and feed the effort towards a more mindful way of living. We can often be overwhelmed by the intensity of the city, but the same things that overwhelm might offer the opportunity for a richer life that lessens the impact of adversity.

Question for the week: How can the city broaden your “life’s lake?”