Top 9 Ways to be Mindful in 2009

By Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

1. Breathe

Why is it that mindfulness folks are always talking about the breath? Because it is an ever-present anchor for our attention in the present moment. As long as you are alive, you can become aware of your breathing at any time. Becoming mindful of your breathing is also very subtle and inconspicuous, so you can practice during a meeting, while riding the subway, or standing in line at the store.

2. Attend a meditation group

NYC has many ongoing meditation groups for beginners and more experienced practitioners. Use the UM calendar to find a convenient group for you by clicking here: NYC Meditation Calendar.

3. Use technology to help

Computers, cell phones, TV, and the internet. We often find ourselves wrapped-up in these devices in a very un-mindful kind-of-way. However, they are merely tools; they do not have any inherent interest in promoting distraction. So, we can use them to help support our meditation or mindfulness practice. I’ll be posting more on this issue in the coming months. However, here are a few ideas for now:

•On-line: Set a bell to ring periodically to remind you to be mindfully present. Click here for a helpful website: Mindfulness Bell

•iPhone: Use the Clock to set a countdown timer for your meditation sessions. Now, you won’t be peeking at the clock!

•Computer: Set your screen saver to display an inspirational reminder, like “Be” or “Peace”.

•TV: During the commercial breaks, check in with your breathing and posture. Simply notice what is happening in your body.

4. Create a Sensory Mindfulness Kit

Mindfulness isn’t just about breathing or meditating. It’s about paying attention, and our senses provide us with important information about our experience. You can create a box for “moments of mindfulness” by collecting objects that appeal to your five senses: touch, sight, taste, hearing, and smell. A patient of mine once collected items related to the beach: sand, tropical postcard, chocolate with coconut, CD of ocean sounds, and suntan lotion (for its scent). She would bust-out this Sensory Mindfulness Kit whenever she wanted a few moments of peace and awareness.

5. Put reminders at “points of performance”

In working with folks with ADD/ADHD, I advise the use of Post-It reminders at particular “points of performance”. If you know that you will need something at a specific place, then write a reminder to yourself at that place or close to it. For example, you might attach a note to “Sit with Dignity” on your computer screen in order to prompt better awareness of your posture.

6. Practice Money Mindfulness

It’s likely going to be a tough year financially for many people. Grim economic news is likely to cause lots of worry, panic, stress, and real hardship. As a result, it’s important to cultivate mindfulness particularly at these times. If you’re panicked about your long-term investments, then practice some mindfulness strategies when you get wrapped up in worry and regret. If you really do need to make some changes in your financial portfolio, then it is also best to ground yourself mindfully before proceeding with decision-making. The best money-managers that I’ve seen are the ones with crunch the numbers unemotionally with equanimity as opposed to letting their emotions go up and down with the NYSE.

7. Pay attention to how and when—not what—you eat

Many people will try to diet and lose weight this year. A big culprit in our struggle with weight is related to our simple failure to pay attention to our body’s cues of hunger and satiety. Thus, it is important to slow down and notice how your body feels before you start eating. If you’re hungry, then eat. If not, then don’t. Hunger should be your “trigger” for eating, not sitting on the couch.

8. Remind yourself about what matters most

Mindfulness is helpful in many ways, including helping us realize the degree to which our actions (and reactions) fall in line with our fundamental values, morals, and goals. As we cultivate mindful awareness, we can reflect on what we’ve noticed and learn to better appreciate what’s happening as it happens. Thus, we can see (and transcend) automatic patterns, which might not be serving us well. For example, by noticing the urge to overeat or seeing the start of our procrastination ritual, we can stop the process and bring more purpose to what we decide to do next.

9. Check out Urban Mindfulness regularly

There are big plans brewing for 2009. We’ll have podcasts and downloadable meditations available. The UM blog will have more contributors and more frequent updates. Also, we’ll be pursuing more formal efforts at marketing and branding. If you’d like to become part of the UM team, please send an e-mail to UrbanMindfulness [at] gmail.com.

'Tis the Season: Mindful Touring NYC with a Friend

By Irene Javors, LMHC

For the last two weeks, a very dear friend has been staying with me. She recently lost her beloved partner of some forty years and she has come to visit. She is immersing herself in the city's cultural riches In all my spare moments, I have been going with her to various NY attractions. Usually, with work and family obligations, I have so little time to take in Gotham's great abundance of just about everything. During one of our meanderings, we found ourselves in the area of Fifth Avenue and 56th Street. I looked down the avenue and I was suddenly struck with how beautiful everything looked. With all the holiday lights and the store windows ablaze with the colors of the season, I felt myself awash with a childlike glee.

My friend tells me that, "NY is incredible!" She wants to absorb as much of it as she can. At times, I want to tell her that the terrific energy that she experiences is really the collective auras of frantic, anxious people who are lost in their individual bubbles. But I refrain from saying anything and I try to enter into the mind of someone who does not have the sometimes jaded eyes of a native New Yorker.

Her observations of the city are quite refreshing. She sees the diversity as "amazing". The subways are a challenge but," wow, you don't need to take your car." What is 'old hat' to me is brand new to my friend. My frustrations with Gotham melt away each time she makes one of these comments. I become more mindful of the uniqueness of this city.

I am also quite aware that Gotham is helping my friend cope with her terrible loss. The city is a setting wherein she is working through her grief. New York has lived through so much loss itself, that it has the compassionate openness to absorb the enormity of my friend's loss. This place, awash with so much life. offers the hope of renewal.

For my dear friend, New York is a light in the darkness of her loss. That is really something to celebrate!

Holiday Mindfulness: Tips for Making It Through the Season

By Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

I’ve been feeling pretty shell-shocked lately. There’s a lot happening in my life and the city. Budget problems and economic woes dominate the headlines: MTA is facing a serious budget shortfall, Mayor Bloomberg wants to withhold annual rebate checks for homeowners, and companies are laying off workers daily. The stock market has been going up and down so often that it reminds me of a hyperactive toddler on moon bounce. On top of these stressors, it is also the holiday season.

Last year around this time, I spent a lot of time thinking about holiday cards while embroiled in gift-buying angst. What do I buy for whom? How much should I spend? What’s the “perfect” gift?

This year, I have found that my mind has been dominated by thoughts on limiting expenses and working within a budget. When I see something that looks like it would make a nice present, then “It’s too expensive” quickly comes to mind. It indeed might be “too expensive,” but I haven’t considered it yet in any thoughtful way.

While I might be preoccupied with the economy and presents, others might be distracted by thoughts of spending time with difficult family members or worried about work’s “Secret Santa” exchange. Of course, our holiday-related thoughts aren’t always negative. We might be excited by having a few days of vacation or hosting a joyous celebration with family and friends. Regardless of whether we’re thinking “negative” or “positive” thoughts about the holiday, we’re still stuck in our heads. Thinking, considering, excitedly planning, philosophizing, wondering, worrying--it doesn’t matter. All of the stuff “up there,” can remove us from the world “down here” where we live.

So, what to do? How can we practice mindfulness during the holiday season in the city? Well, here are a few tips that I’ve found to be helpful personally.

Return to your senses for information about your surroundings. Many places have put up holiday ornaments or lights, which are a distinct departure from the norm. Some can be quite pretty, too. It doesn’t have to be something as grand as the tree at Rockefeller Center. Pretty lights and displays can be found all around us. Even the electric menorah at your dry cleaners might be pretty in some ways. Why not take a more serious look? Some restaurants and cafes have seasonal foods. Try a gingerbread muffin, and allow yourself a few moments to revel in its taste. Nice? When you pass a Christmas tree seller on the street, take a few moments to smell the pine. When was the last time the aroma of pine wafted through NYC streets?

Make an effort to spend more time with friends and family either on the phone or in person. Rather than searching stores for presents or trawling the internet, talk with someone who is on your list. Learn more about them and what’s been happening in their life. By being present in such a conversation, you might naturally discover what would be a nice present for him or her. However, having a heart-to-heart chat demonstrates more care and love than an expensive present anyway. Also, the whole point of getting someone a present is to show how much they matter to you. Maybe you can express this sentiment directly through a deep talk or a card. Consider what would matter more to you: a “perfect” present sent from someone who you haven’t been close to lately or more time actually spent with that person. For me, it’s been a relief to realize that I’m rich with friends and family, regardless of the economy. As such, it is more important for us to spend time together rather than spending money on each other.

Continue (or start) your meditation practice. Meditation has been shown scientifically to have substantial health benefits. Often, it can provide a sense of groundedness and peace as well. So, be sure to continue your practice during the holiday season. Or, if you haven’t tried meditation recently (or ever), read some of the UM handouts and give it a try tonight. I’ve also recommended some books in the UM Amazon store, which you might want to consider for yourself or someone you love.

Do something seasonal. There are many events and things to do around the city. You can volunteer at a local relief shelter, visit Santa, or attend a Hanukkah celebration at your local synagogue. Check with TimeOut NYC or re-visit some of organizations that are important to you. Typically, there will be some seasonal offerings. Even Buddhist sanghas appreciate the importance of the holiday season. For example, this weekend, the Shambala Center of NYC is hosting a Winter Solstice celebration for families in celebration of Children’s Day. Take a peek at what’s out there and enjoy!

Be mindful of your breathing. Bring it back to basics: our breath is always here. We can always become aware of our in-breath and out-breath as a way to anchor our mind in the present moment. I particularly like using the breath as a focus of mindfulness because it is omnipresent and inconspicuous. You have to breathe, even if it’s holiday time in the city.