Death of the Good Samaritan?

By Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

Last week, a homeless man, Hugo Alfredo Tale-Yax, intervened to stop a physical altercation between a man and a woman in Queens.  A few hours later, he was found dead on the sidewalk as a victim of multiple stab wounds.  According to surveillance video, the man collapsed on the street a couple hours before emergency personnel were summoned to the scene.  In the interim, 25 people passed by him without offering assistance or even checking to see how he was doing.

This being NYC, most people are seemingly nonplussed by the commitment of murder.  Rather, it is the apparent disregard for the plight of a man lying face down on the sidewalk (as he might have slowly been dying) that is causing the greatest concern for our humanity.  Why did no one offer to help? Most of the press coverage has characterized Mr. Tale-Yax's murder as the "death of a good Samaritan," based on his role in assisting the woman being assaulted earlier in the evening.

For the New York Times account of the story, click here:  Good Samaritan

For the New York Post story (and surveillance video), click here:  Good Samaritan

In considering this characterization, I reflected on the biblical story of the Good Samaritan.  Found in the Gospel of Luke, the original parable describes the actions of a man (i.e., the good Samaritan) who showed mercy for someone who he found hurt by the side of the road.  He bandaged the wounded man and paid for him to receive lodging and care after he personally escorted him to a local inn.  Others had passed-by this same man, and offered no assistance.  Barring any allegorical interpretations, the parable is meant to illustrate that everyone is deserving of our compassion, just as we bestow it upon ourselves (i.e., "Love they neighbor like thyself").

So, in considering what happened last week, "the death of a good Samaritan" applies not only to Mr. Tale-Yax, but also to the 2 dozen people who passed by without demonstrating any concern or compassion.  What has become of us that we no longer offer help to someone in need?  Are we too overwhelmed?  Uncaring?  Too distracted?  Too scared?  What action--even something small--can we take in such circumstances? What would you have done?  What will you do next time?  How would you want someone to respond if you were in distress?

Mindfulness Quote

Submitted by Irene Javors, LMHC

The Roman statesman and stoic philosopher once wrote, "true happiness is ... to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future."

Staying in the 'now' is easier said than done. We are either looking backward or rushing forward. To stay present is to let go of control, to let life unfold. This makes us very frightened and we get a terrible case of the "what if's" and "woulda, coulda, shoulda's." Staying in the moment and just breathing? What a relief from all those creeping anxieties!

Body (and Mind) Sculpting in 4 Steps

By Jenny Taitz, Ph.D.

Can spin class also be a practice in present, non judgmental awareness?

Cardiovascular activity has been found to be nearly as effective as antidepressant medication in treating both depression and anxiety.   In major cities, gyms and yoga studios are often replete with attractive, fit, seemingly perfect people.   While walking on the treadmill, it can be tempting to begin to think, “Why can’t I look like him? Why doesn’t my significant other look like that? How is she so thin? I wish I could find a job. What should I buy for dinner?  I can’t believe I can’t stand on my head after all these years…”  Catch my drift?

Exercise may be an opportunity to simultaneously practice discipline with your mind and body.   While trying to take care of your body, it can be worthwhile to check in with your mind.  Reviewing your recent tax filing while in down dog will not help you increase your rebate!

The gym may provide you with an opportunity to let go of comparing yourself to others, quit your unpaid position as a model scout,  and take a mental break from the tasks on your to do lists.  I’m guessing this may supercharge the antidepressant effect of exercise.  Imagine a full 30 minutes free of the thoughts and judgments.  Alternatively, you may fill your mind by listening to music, focusing on your breathing, attending to your muscles and physical sensations. 

It may be helpful to:

1. Come up with a plan: If you notice you’re having a tough day, commit to letting go of the office when you change into your gym clothes.


2. Attend fully to the moment: What are you doing?  Are you on mile 1 and thinking 2 miles to go?  Return to just where you are. 


3. Let go of judgments:  We are often drawn to judge ourselves and others (“I hate this song!”) It may be worthwhile to experiment with nonjudgmental curiosity.


4. Keep trying:  You can’t train for a triathlon in a week, so too, you cannot expect your mind to quiet immediately.   It’s been working so hard to keep you thinking and will automatically turn to thoughts.  That’s ok, but can you try again to hear the music?

 

So, are you ready to spin those legs and stop that mind?

Modern koan

By Jonathan Kaplan, Ph.D.

One of the characteristics of Zen Buddhism is the use of koans--or riddles--for meditation practice.  Questions such as "What is the sound of one hand clapping?" and "What was your face before you were born?" are used to prompt reflection and a disentanglement from literal, rational thought.  Another popular koan is "If you meet the Buddha in the road, kill him."

Recently, I experienced a modern variation of this traditional koan.  I accidentally taped two recordings of the PBS documentary, The Buddha, last week.  So, I sat down to delete one of the shows from my DVR and I received the following message, asking for confirmation:

"Are you sure that you want to delete The Buddha?"

Spring Mindfulness in Gotham: Finding a Middle Way

By Irene Javors, LMHC

The "winter of our discontent" has finally ended. The sun is out and the world is suddenly filled with light. We have weathered months of heavy snow falls and deluge like rainstorms. At times, we could have used sleds to transport us or even an ark to float us above the rising flood waters brought about by the torrential rains. We have been living in a climate of such extremes. I have been wondering if the earth has been reflecting back to us the extremism of the age in which we live. Our culture polarizes everything- black and white thinking and no shades of grey. The wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the violence here at home with right wing extremists and urban gangs, and the lack of civility in Congress all amount to a continuous reinforcing of the idea that "might makes right." There seems to be little room for measured tones or moderation.

Spring is the season for taking time to do the proverbial "smelling of the flowers." All around us is an abundance of color and life. This is welcome excess. Unlike the harshness of winter with its howling winds and blinding snows, we are now in a more gentle season. If we stay mindful of all the beauty that surrounds us we will be able to carve out a middle way between the extremes of winter and spring. The natural world has much to teach us in the way of harmony and balance. Walk around your neighborhood and take in the way nature has provided us with the warmth of the sun, the flowers, and the magnificence of the trees in bloom.

Most of all, to find a middle way, in these difficult times, open your eyes to the inter-relationship of all life. The way through the extremes is the path of gratitude.  Let us celebrate this season of rebirth!